Life & Love

You’re here because you want a smooch. A big, ol’, preferably not wet kiss right on the lips. Of course you do. Instead of providing a step-by-step guide that overcomplicates the act or bringing in a scientist to break down the steps, we called in a few experts. This is for you, Dr. Hitch, and a few other options for your first base endeavors. XoXo.


Here’s how to kiss…

According to the internet

According to Vedic Sanskrit texts

The earliest understanding of kissing dates back to approximately 1500 B.C. Something similar to kissing is mentioned in India’s Vedic Sanskrit texts. The word kiss is not mentioned but references to licking and “drinking a moisture of the lips” allude to the act of locking lips.

According to LIFE’s 1942 How To Kiss Guide

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Courtesy

“Boy and girl should stand close together and not hold each other too tightly.” Problematic.

“Girl should sit on arm of the chair and boy should hold her firmly but lightly.” Still problematic.

According to TLC’s Love at First Kiss

Josh, 27, started with a few minutes of mirror self talk, followed by mouth spray, and watching a few videos on YouTube. His notes included “put the arms around” and “maybe do something with the hair.”

According to Dr. Hitch from the 2005 hit movie Hitch

“The secret to a kiss is going 90% of the way” — Dr. Hitch

According to Siri

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According to a senior

“I’ve always considered myself a great kisser. My husband always says he fell in love with me after our first kiss! First take your time, you might want to lightly lick his lips first and let him get real excited and then put your tongue in and enjoy it! Hot and wet is the way to go!” — Vera, 77

According to an adult



“First, I like to caress the guy’s facial beard a little bit before placing my baby soft lips (shout out to Bite’s Agave Sugar Lip Scrub!) on his. Then lean in, positioning my head in a different direction from his to avoid awkward head bumps and just go for it. If I’m really into it, I’ll suck on his bottom lip and release to spice it up a bit. Pro tip: Don’t pucker, nobody wants to kiss hard lips.” — Nerisha, 24

According to a child

“[Laughs] Like you’re putting on chapstick. When you put it on you rub your lips together. You need to puff your cheeks out to kiss. Like a blowfish! You can put your mouth together too.” Nevaeh, 8

Smooches!

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